Justin's Blog

No.  I was sitting on a pew in church looking at the tabernacle when that thought came to my mind from the depths of my heart.  Before I continue I would like to marvel in the fact that fasting does reveal my heart. I had heard it said that one of the outcomes of fasting is that our true selves are revealed. Sometimes we are snappy, or we desire things to satisfy us. I encourage you to try and deny yourself a few meals and go to God in prayer and talk to Him. Figure out who you really are when your needs are not met and see what it is you reach for and desire to satisfy you. Coming back to my own revelation through fasting. Today when I looked at the tabernacle I felt a deep sadness and also a bit of anger at my God when I told Him, "I prayed for her". I felt an ugliness. I knew it was my pride that spoke. I knew I felt that because I prayed for her, I deserved her to be mine.  I took the feeling to adoration. There I looked at God and told Him how I felt, and surrendered...

- Fr. Beau Schweitzer, SOLT I chose St Timothy Disciple of St. Paul The hand gesture used by St. Timothy (and often Christ and other saints) in religious art, with two fingers stretched upwards and three folded down or joined, is a rich piece of Christian symbolism related to key doctrinal beliefs. The meaning of the specific finger positions is as follows: The three fingers (thumb, ring, and pinky) joined or held together symbolize the Holy Trinity: God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. The two fingers (index and middle) stretched upwards represent the two natures of Jesus Christ: that he is both fully divine and fully human in one person (the Incarnation). Read more about him here

Somewhat.  Click here for this year's goals. I did not finish the Catechism in a Year Podcast. No excuse. I'm still on Day #34 I got confirmed this year! Thanks to Ashley, Fr. Antonio, Fr. Beau, and Ms. Anselma, I was. I chose Fr. Beau as a sponsor earlier this year and after a few weeks the news was that he was reassigned and was leaving Benque. Because of this there were a couple options: I could choose a different sponsor, keep him and while he is away he could find a proxy, or to keep him as my sponsor and ask Fr. Jordan if Fr. Tony could confirm me. I chose to have Fr. Beau and Fr. Tony be there. Fr. Beau asked Fr. Jordan and he agreed to give Fr. Tony Permission to confirm me. I was so excited and I wished I had told more people about it. I am happy the people I care about were there. Ashley, Tessa, and Judson drove all the way from Burrell Boom to be there.    This is a picture with My mom on the left, me, Fr. Beau above, Ashley, Judson, and Tessa  I have not ...

I don't see your mistakes. I don't see your (A) Cracks, your chinks, your stains, your blemishes, or (A) Stains from makeup and tears that fall on you (B) After shots and too many hearts made blue (B) When I look at you, I am sure there's more. (A) I see a beauty that pleads an encore, (A) Allure that beckons the gaze to go for (A) A second glimpse of love that radiates (C) Truth amidst use, this my soul satiates. (C) When I look at you, I am sure there's more. (A) I wish to look, spend a lifetime or four (A) Ever behold splendor more precious than (D) Rubies, land or all that is grand for Man (D) For I look at you, I know that there's more. (A) Sonnet: AABBA AACCA ADDA

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An easy way of getting a blogpost in is giving an update on how my goals are coming along. Also, going back to the old post ( that you can read here ) is good way to reflect on these goals since I had forgotten some of them.  Finish The Catechism in a Year Podcast  I have not.  Even though I had a bit of a "headstart" I did not get too far into the episodes. I am at Day 30 (CCC #212-221) Get confirmed  I have not.  I did not get a sponsor (Godparent). I was supposed to be confirmed around Easter this year, but since I could not find one it had to be postponed until next year. My mom had suggested Deacon Cal, and a few other people were suggested to me by Ms. Anselma. I had read that it needed to be someone you can trust to seek advice from. Nobody I had been considering were close enough to me that I would seek them out to talk to. Weeks passed and I just hadn't been going to the OCIA (Order of Christian Initiation of Adults) classes. It wasn't until a few Sunda...

     I never thought the question would be on my mind for so long. Since I had my conversion in Mexico, I felt strongly that I should choose a Saint whose relic I saw in the Basilica of Our Lady of Guadalupe. St. José Sánchez del Río's toe was in the basilica.  I had watched the movie about his life, and later I read the book about his life and fell deeper in love with his sacrifice. I was determined to have him be my patron Saint. Although, I had never asked for his intercession. Rarely had I ever asked for a Saint's intercession.      Around March 19 of this year, I went to confession. I had confessed a sin I was addicted to, and Fr. Mike had advised me to pray for the intercession of St. Joseph for help with fighting this addiction. I did ask for help after that confession but thought little of it. Looking back at it a few days I had realized I had not fallen into the same sin for some time. That intercession I felt had been the first time I re...

As we approach lent, we must think of three things: prayer, almsgiving, and fasting.  Prayer - According to the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC), prayer is "the raising of one's mind and heart to God" or "the petition of good things from God in accord with His will," With Ms. Anselma in an RCIA class we spoke of how prayer could feel like we are trying to go around God's will and make our own happen. This definition from the Catechism clarifies it "the petition of good things from God in accord with His will," This lent I will continue to pray the rosary daily, but I will pray one in the morning (6:00 a.m.) and one in the evening (3:00 p.m.). Almsgiving The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) defines almsgiving as giving to the poor or performing acts of charity. I always struggle with this. I had to google ideas for almsgiving. I feel like donating clothes but people my size aren't as common...or possibly needy. Spending time teaching...

I did not receive the Eucharist.  For some time I was struggling with sin. I still am, but I would try to punish myself by not receiving the Eucharist. I would not go to Mass many times because I felt it was pointless not to partake of the sacrament. One Sunday as I sat at the back of the church and saw the priest raise the Host I began crying because I could not receive Him because I knew our relationship was bad and I had not been to confession. I eventually went to confession and have been many times since.  I recently began trying to go to daily Mass and pray the Rosary daily. It has been strengthening and deepening my love for God. A few days ago, I went to evening Mass at Divine Mercy. I had begun going to Mass in Benque before I left for work, but that day I was so tired I decided to push it down to when I was already in Belize City. After communion I was praying and remembered that I had promised God many years back that I would give my life in service to Him. Tears fi...

I read it.  Fr. Antonio's book was great. It was an easy read, and it provided me with a lot of help when I was struggling to start praying again. I still need to work on the habit of daily prayer but through things in this book I have a deeper appreciation for my prayer life. Thank you, Fr. Tony, I only wish I read it sooner. If you want to watch a series on the book with the author himself, I put a link below.  10 Episode Series of Pray or Die  

I noticed this has become a tradition for the blog. So, this year's goals are based on some old ones.  Finish The Catechism in a Year Podcast I started the podcast with Fr. Mike a few days into December. (On day 13) I've missed a lot of days in between because I haven't been consistent, but the episodes themselves are short, around 15-20 minutes. Get confirmed  Thanks to Ms. Ashley, Fr. Antonio, and Ms. Anselma, I think that will happen this year. Find my vocation I am still praying about my vocation. I really want this year to be when I make a decision. I don't want to keep putting it off. I even mentioned to my mom that I am praying to find my vocation. Please pray for me to have the courage to accept the call. Walk across Belize and visit every parish This is something I have wrestled with for a long time. Funny is I was not going to add it here, but I was listening to Matt Fradd's  Chill AMA Stream Before New Year’s ☕️+ 🚬+ 🎇  and he brought up the fact it'...

I am trying to pray the Rosary daily.  When I downloaded the hallow app, I prayed the rosary with the app having the different voices lead and I would follow along. On the first night I chose the actor that plays Jesus in the Chosen to be the voice that led. Here is the link if you would like to download it and try for yourself:  Hallow - #1 Catholic Prayer and Meditation App I'm not sponsored; I'm not even using all the features since I'm using the free version which is limited to just a couple things but still super helpful.  A tragedy happened some time ago that a man killed a baby, I was around that time watching this video:  (220) The Holy Rosary: EVERYTHING You've Ever Wanted to Know w/ Gabi Castillo - YouTube I was praying the Rosary daily and knelt during the last sorrowful mystery and just cried and prayed for that baby.  I encourage you who are reading this, please pray the Rosary.

Another draft I never finished is this unfinished short story. If it is a good idea let me know and I'll keep working on stories based on Sunday's readings. ========================================================================== (Taken from the Gospel of the Twenty-first Sunday in Ordinary Time) ========================================================================== My Goal: Make weekly stories based on something from the week's Gospel for my spiritual growth and to use my talents for a form of evangelization. Characters: the people who make the story happen.           (Yessi (wears a red hat, and likes cooking, hates dishes, friends went to college, age 24),            Carl (likes dogs and camping, age 25)) Setting: the where and when of the story.           (Benque, Now) Plot: the events that happen in the story.  1. They are in zone of comfort - Carl is camping / Yessi is cooking...

since a while back. I'm currently listening to Matt Frad and working on this blog and I came across this draft. Shout out to Amy for being the first co-host with me on Morning Glory Episode Four! Check it out here:   https://www.youtube.com/live/Z44wVjzB2SA?si=n6jCJczIedj3szd-

Somewhat.  Here is the link to this year's goals. I put off the first goal most of the year. Thankfully I had mentioned it to Ms. Ashley, and she gave me the option to take RCIA classes in Belize City or talk to Fr. Tony to take them in Benque. I chose to talk to Fr. Tony and do it in Benque. He said I could take the classes with Ms. Anselma. So, for a number of weeks we have been meeting to read this book: Finding my vocation was not as easy. I talked to a volunteer here in Benque, an aspirant for the priesthood, and he told me about volunteering in the Caribbean. He saw the need for fathers, but he saw the need for priests was more. Also, from watching Pints with Aquinas I heard that your vocation is found when you feel your truest self. This year Father Tony gave me a book on prayer to read and following its guide and praying daily and going to daily Mass for a time I felt like my truest self. I felt more fulfilled than when I was in a relationship. That relationship ended late...

 I prayed today. 

 I prayed today. I am enjoying prayer more. 

I procrastinated because I had a day off today. I thought I was gonna pray during the Morning Glory show, I did not.  Thankfully Ashley Gillett asked if I could fill in for an hour of adoration and I did. It was a beautiful time spent there in prayer.

Today was the first day I had to put in effort to be consistent with my daily prayer. I chose to pray and eat cereal. I am going to go get ready for English morning Mass at Divine Mercy.

Another day, another prayer.